How well do you influence?

To influence is an art that has been lost in the volume of information that people are swamped with today. As we are all aware, information is readily available in overwhelming volumes – through the media, the internet and social media networking. One of the biggest hindrances to success is all about persuading the people you wish to influence. Even the best business proposal will not gain traction if you are unable to influence or persuade your target. The important thing is influence and not just inform. Following are five prongs of persuasion:
  • Words: Express yourself with positive, specific and precise words. Don’t use negative, vague words.
  • Rhetoric: Use rhetoric to get your message across, include powerful messaging and use memorable phrasing.
  • Emotion: Draw on emotions to get your message across. Create feelings such as pleasure, fear, safety, acceptance, and prestige. Decisions are based on emotions.
  • Logic: People need to justify their emotional decisions with reason. Help to interpret the facts, information and ideas that are available. Take a point of view. Lead others to draw  conclusions.
  • Trustworthiness: Demonstrate your integrity. People need to trust your personal values and genuineness before they’ll believe what you say.

Information floods the airwaves, the internet, and our in-boxes. And with that influx, influence has become rare. Yet channelled toward a goal, influence – not simply information – drives action and results.

If you would like to improve your effectiveness as a leader, or communicator within your business, family or life in general, contact us for a complimentary 45 minute discovery session.

What is Energy Leadership

As some of you may know, I am one of only 2-3 Australians certified in the Energy Leadership Index – one of the top tools recommended by the Coaches Forum at Forbes Magazine.

Energy Leadership™ is the process that develops a personally effective style of leadership that positively influences and changes not only yourself, but also those with whom you work and interact.

As individuals, we view the world through filters (based on our experiences, values, assumptions, etc.). Those filters will either limit what we see or expand what we see. As a result, they impact how we perceive and what we think about our circumstances. Throughout our whole life, we’ve unconsciously developed filters, which may be holding us back from seeing the full potential of ourselves and what our life and career have to offer.

LEADERSHIP: EVERYONE IS A LEADER EITHER BY CHOICE OR DEFAULT.

Leadership is how you interact with everyone, including yourself. Leaders are quite visible within small and large businesses. We tend to think of them as business owners, CEO’s and managers at all levels. Traditionally, leadership also extends into politics and other global affairs. However, parents, therapists and health care providers, solopreneurs, sports coaches, consultants, mentors, partners in relationship, teachers, authors, and others who interact with people on a regular basis are all leaders.

If we don’t think of yourself as a leader, then you are limited in your thinking. Leading is the way we help move people into action, including us. The question is not whether or not we are leaders, but how well we lead.

ENERGY – THE TWO STREAMS IN LIFE – WHICH ONE DO YOU SWIM IN? 

A relentlessly damaging stream is flowing through the world. This stream is not created by water, but by fear. It is the Stream of Unconsciousness.

Its constructive counterpart, the Stream of Consciousness, is fed by creative and positive thinking that produces questions like “What’s right,” “What’s the opportunity here,” and “How can we make this work?” In contrast, the Stream of Unconsciousness is based on only one question: “What’s wrong?” This stream is the one most of us have been trained to see, listen to, drink from, and bathe in since birth.

During any typical workday, most people spend a great deal of time focusing on what’s wrong — with their family, their jobs, their projects, their colleagues, their relationships, and their lives. At work, it’s not surprising that studies show that more than 50 per cent of the people would choose, if they could, to quit their jobs.

What will it take to shift the pressure and negativity that surrounds not only our careers but our personal lives and the state of our communities?  What will help employees to be productive, content, and have a positive view of both the organizations they work for and the people they work with?

CATABOLIC AND ANABOLIC ENERGY: THE TWO FORCES THAT CREATE YOUR WORLD 

More than a hundred years ago, Albert Einstein addressed the scientific community, passionately presenting the idea that everything we see, hear, taste, touch, and smell is not matter, but energy.  Everything that “matters” is energy.

On an energetic and cellular level, catabolism usually refers to a breakdown of complex molecules, while anabolism is the opposite.  When you hear about a person’s catabolic or anabolic energy, however, it’s a broader statement about destructive and constructive forces in an entire person, who is made up not only of individual cells but also of anabolic and catabolic thoughts and beliefs.

Anabolic and Catabolic energy are predominant in organizations as well as people.  Many organizations experience catabolic energy by constantly reacting to their circumstances with worry, fear, doubt, anger, and guilt.  And thoughts are indeed contagious.  When even a few people in an organization have negative feelings, it can spread like a virus. “Group think” sets in, and their thoughts become group “fact.”

Remember that “group think” begins with “leader think”. At its core, an organization strongly reflects how its leader thinks, feels, and acts.  Anabolic leaders have the ability to motivate and inspire themselves and others to do extraordinary things.

No matter how effective or ineffective you currently are in your role, you can transform yourself and others, as well as your organization, into a thriving, inspired, positive, productive, and successful entity. And, thus begins your journey to become the Ideal Leader.

The Energy Leadership Index (E.L.I.) is a unique assessment that enables participants to get a snapshot of their perceptions, attitudes, behaviours, and overall leadership capabilities. The Energy Leadership Index assessment reveals what specific filters you’ve developed and how those filters are influencing the results you’re achieving.

In a way, it’s a snapshot of you, and how you show up in the world. It shows the effects of stress on your performance and targets areas where you can shift your energy to be more successful.

If you would like to find out more about Energy Leadership get in touch via our Contact page.

Essential questions for success in 2021

10 Essential Questions to Guarantee Success in 2021

Why do dumb things happen to smart companies? After 25 years of strategy consulting, I would like to suggest some of the following reasons:

  • Companies repeat mistakes
  • Work gets duplicated
  • Customer relations are strained
  • Good ideas don’t get shared
  • Competition is around price
  • Not keeping up with market leaders or innovators
  • Dependence on a few key individuals
  • Slow to innovate
  • Lack of good market knowledge

People don’t choose for good things to go bad, just as executives don’t choose strategies that fail.

Bottom line I think, is that people in organisations aren’t finding the insights they need, and this has real business consequences.

You may have your new year strategy already drafted, and now the focus is just on starting the new year afresh. However, doing this without first reviewing the past year could land you in some murky waters – with issues unresolved, staff dissatisfied, and without clearly understanding what may not have gone so well, and what could be done better next time.

So during February, schedule some time for yourself, or if you prefer as a team exercise, and use these questions to explore 2020, gain the insights necessary, and ensure you achieve higher goals in 2021:

  1. What was the most successful initiative of 2020?
  2. What was the most disappointing (honesty wins out over whitewashing)
  3. Do you feel you maximised opportunities? If not, why not?
  4. What could you change now that would have maximum impact on company performance?
  5. How could you make this change happen and continue in 2021?
  6. What will be your “theme” in 2021?
  7. What would be the ideal working environment you would like to have in 2021, and what steps are needed to make it a reality?
  8. What could you do to provide the tools to help you work smarter and better next year (eg mentoring, training, coaching)?
  9. What initiatives could you implement to help your staff work better and as a stronger team?
  10. What are the three actions you can take now to start the year off on the right foot?

These questions are a catalyst for looking at your business. Taking the time to honestly (and without any blame) review both what worked well, and what didn’t work, will strengthen the bonds within your team and ensure that you all start the year positively and motivated to making it a success for everyone.

 

Coaching in 2021:

If you have considered coaching and would like support in 2021 to achieve your career or personal goals get in touch via our contact form to arrange an initial discovery session.

A discovery session is a 45 minute complimentary session where you can experience the coaching process for 30 minutes and then ask any questions you may have for the remaining 15 minutes.  We will both know by the end of the session if we are a good fit.

Start 2021 on fresh footing – with clarity and purpose.

Simplicity Principle

The Simplicity Principle of Life

Like many of you during this Covid-19 crisis, I read a lot and have come across some great articles and ideas that I would like to share with you over the coming months.

There was one article in particular around simplicity that resonated strongly with me. If you are like me, the pandemic has made me realise how much I want to simplify things both in my business and in my life.

Confucius once said that life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.

How true is that?

Today in a VUCA (Volatile, Uncertain, Complex and Ambiguous) World, the complexity of business decisions, automation, technology and AI, bears both financial and emotional consequences for us all. Then with the disruption of Covid-19 on top of all of this, we are experiencing significant stress levels.

As humans, our desire for simplicity is not new, especially during times when society undergoes upheaval. So while everyone is talking about robotics, machine learning, AI, we need to be reminded that we – as humans – need meaning and connection. We also need boundaries as much as we need to sleep.

Psychologists and neuroscientists understand that we can not go overloading people with systems and structures that are complex and anti-human. We have information overload, decision fatigue, and the “always-on” culture. So the craving for simplicity is not surprising.

The opposite for CAT – a work-life of complexity, anxiety and time poverty – is KISS.

Most of you would know the KISS principle – Keep it Simple Stupid! Living by KISS means making a commitment to pursuing clarity and a commitment to avoid decision fatigue in which too many choices limits and inhibits people. Steve Jobs always wore a black t-shirt and jeans, Barack Obama wore either a blue suit or a grey suit, and Apple remains a great example of a company committed to simple and functional design.

People who live by the KISS principle think and behave in a more agile way as they don’t feel so burdened.

So what are the elements of the simplicity principle?

Here are five areas that leaders following the simplicity principle observe – you may come up with more:

  1. They have boundaries. They know their limits, and they observe them. Did you know that it has been estimated that it takes literally 23 minutes and 15 seconds for the human brain to refocus after being online and task switching? A boundary may involve being clear about when you will be on digital devices – and when you will be focused in conversation.
  2. They know how to reset and rest. By trusting simplicity, you take time out to value nature and appreciate how calming it can be. As we all know, being always ‘on’ is bound to lead to failure.
  3. KISS leaders treat their schedules like their bodies. They control what goes in their schedule like they would control what they eat. They know when to stop and may choose to create daily time blocks to address important tasks.
  4. They balance technological speed and scale against reality. They address the human dimension and its impact on every worker and customer in an organisation. They place the human at the centre of work execution.
  5. They understand that there is collective talent, insight and wisdom among their network. People want to serve and share in a myriad of ways.

Turning the complex into the simple will always be a constant challenge. It is something we all need to consciously work on to improve the way we think and act. Steve Jobs said “Simple can be harder than complex; You have to work hard to get your thinking clean to make it simple. But it is worth it in the end because once you get there, you can move mountains”.

Accentuate Positive

Accentuate the Positive

This month for something different I thought I would share some short messages and videos which I’ve recently found – many of which have been quite useful!

Accentuate the Positive
I was watching some old movies and recalled a song called “Accentuate the Positive”. After a little research I learned the words were written by Johnny Mercer in 1944 – at a time when the “War to End All Wars” was still raging. The world longed for peace and hope and a way to look up. The songs wonderful lyrics are actually useful as a powerful success formula:

“Accentuate the positive,
Eliminate the negative,
Latch on to the affirmative,
Don’t mess with Mr In between!”

What we accentuate and dwell on, focus on and look for in each day makes all the difference. It’s just like looking at a glass and seeing it half full or half empty.

Words have power. I challenge you to eliminate the negative words as you recognise them. For me, I say the word “Cancel!” when I hear one come out of my mouth and immediately select a positive word to replace it. Try it for just a day. You’ll feel the results! Then make it part of your life routine.

Latch on to the affirmative. Remind yourself what you’ve achieved. Write out positive affirmations that assume the best and keep them in your pocket. Review them often. It’s truly powerful!

And when you’re not sure, just leave those neutral, puzzling areas alone. The questions you can’t answer should not vex you or stop your progress. Just don’t mess with them.

Finally, find a bouncy song that can become YOUR theme song and hum it to yourself now and again. It works for many.

And to add to the affirmative here are two videos that might also help:

Cultivating unconditional self-worth
When a person demands perfection of herself or himself, anything less can feel like failure. Adia Gooden knows this from experience. In addition to her work as a staff psychologist at the University of Chicago, she’s learned in her own life how to break negative thought patterns and live more freely. She shares those lessons in her talk.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EirlZ7fy3bE

What I learned from 100 days of rejection
Jia Jiang adventures boldly into a territory so many of us fear: rejection. By seeking out rejection for 100 days — from asking a stranger to borrow $100 to requesting a “burger refill” at a restaurant — Jiang desensitized himself to the pain and shame that rejection often brings and, in the process, discovered that simply asking for what you want can open up possibilities where you expect to find dead ends.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-vZXgApsPCQ&feature=youtu.be

What about the choices you make?*
You always have a reason–and usually, a pretty good one– for doing what you are doing and choosing what you are choosing. Be careful not to convince yourself that you are doing something against your will. Such a thing is impossible.

Therefore, be honest with yourself as to why you are choosing to do a particular thing. Then, do it gladly, knowing that you are always getting to do what you want. The statement “I have no choice” is a lie. You can choose. You simply do not prefer the alternatives available to you, for whatever reason. So you select the outcome that you most prefer. Isn’t that power?

If you would like some help working through your choices, do get in touch.

*Source:  Neale Donald Walsch – http://www.nealedonaldwalsch.com

 

Energy to Succeed

Do you have the energy to succeed?

So let me start with a simple question – Do you have the energy to succeed?

You can’t hide lack of energy and motivation since it’s evident from how you carry yourself. Sit down somewhere and watch people walking by and you will quickly notice who has what it takes and who hasn’t.

So what do I mean by energy?

Think of energy as two streams of life – one based on negativity and fear thinking, that is “What’s wrong” and the other fed by creative and positive thinking that produces questions like “What’s right,” “What’s the opportunity here,” and “How can we make this work?”

During any typical workday, most people spend a great deal of time focusing on what’s wrong — with their family, their jobs, their projects, their colleagues, their relationships, and their lives.

What we accentuate and dwell on, focus on, and look for in each day makes all the difference.  It’s just like looking at a glass and seeing it half full or half empty.

Which stream do you think you currently swim in? 

What do you think it will take to shift the pressure and negativity that surrounds your life?  What will help you, your colleagues and co-workers to be productive, content, and have a positive view of both the businesses we all work for and the people we work with?

It will require a shift in thinking – as essentially what you think creates your reality.

Let me explain – our thinking is a result on our beliefs, the assumptions we have about the world and life, the interpretations we make about other people’s behaviours and the limitations we perceive in ourselves.  These four factors are the foundations of our thinking and as a result produce the energy we exhibit.

Here are seven suggestions to boost your energy and shift your thinking:

  1. Develop self-awareness

Learn about your default tendencies, that is the way you react generally to circumstances.  Understand how you personally filter information and your perceptions. Ask yourself – what are your thoughts and beliefs in a particular situation you face? How often do you focus on the negative or find yourself in a reactive mode?  How often do you focus on what’s right and are excited about the possibilities?

  1. Be aware of others

Observe your colleagues, co-workers, friends, etc and see how they engage and contribute.  Are they seeing the glass half empty or half full? It is all about “what’s wrong?” or “how can we make this happen?”  Where is their thinking coming from?

  1. Intentionally choose how you are going to show up

Decide how you want to lead and how your energy, values, etc are going to show up in conversations, relationships and decision-making.  Don’t ever forget you have the power to choose.

  1. Ask and listen

Become more aware, through probing and listening, so that you can address matters in a more positive manner. Go back to the video in our Monday Motivation of August 3 to learn more about listening.

  1. Be a coach

Coaching is all about drawing answers from deep within the “coachee”.  It is a positive, collaborative, thought-provoking process.

  1. Find a coach for yourself

Sometimes it is difficult to understand our own deeper feelings and values without someone helping us out.  We may only see our reflection rather than the amazing person in the mirror.

  1. Bring out greatness in yourself and others.

Recognise people for what they are capable of.  Acknowledge and point out their greatness.

Words have power.  I challenge you to eliminate the negative words as you recognise them.  For me I say the word “Cancel!” when I hear one come out of my mouth and immediately select a positive word to replace it.  Try it for just a day.  You’ll feel the results!  Then make it part of your life routine.

Latch on to the affirmative.  Remind yourself what you’ve achieved.  Write a gratitude journal or write out positive affirmations that assume the best and keep them in your pocket.  Review them often.  Both are truly powerful exercises.

How are you going to show up? Do you have the energy to succeed?

If you’d like to get in touch send an email via the Contact Page.

7 deadly sins of business-8

TAKE BACK YOUR LIFE IN 10 STEPS

With all that has gone on around us these past months, from fires, floods to the impact of the virus, I noticed that many of us, sometimes, no longer feel in control.  That is not unreasonable when businesses are shutting down, everyone has to change and work from home, the share market is going down, stocks are low, and there is talk of a recession.

So, I was looking for inspiration to write this newsletter and reviewed some of my favourite articles over the years.   This one really jumped out.

Written by Tony Schwartz (http://theenergyproject.com/about/tony-schwartz)  back in January 2013 in the HBR blog (https://hbr.org/2013/01/take-back-your-life-in-ten-ste.html), I thought his ten steps were powerful yet simple.  You don’t have to do them all but gosh, they are a great place to start.

Here is his blog posting with the ten steps.

You’re smart, hard-working and good at what you do, but the truth is you also too often feel your life is just a relentless set of demands you have to meet, and too rarely a source of satisfaction. You long to feel more in control of your days, but the reality is you’re frequently racing just to keep up.

It doesn’t have to be this way, and the solution has to do with deeply embedding a series of simple practices into your life.

I have ten in mind, but it’s not realistic to add them all at once, assuming there are a number you don’t currently do. Instead, I hope to lead you on a journey in which you add them one at a time, sequentially, over the coming months. You don’t have to do all of them for your life to work really well, and even small changes will often deliver disproportionately large results. At the same time, it’s likely that the more of these you eventually add, the better and more in charge of your life you’ll feel.

The suggestions are in order from the most basic and fundamental, to the highest level.

  1. Get sufficient sleep every night. Sleep is often the single most undervalued behavior in our lives and the one with the most immediate power to improve our experience in every waking moment.
  2. Move more. It’s not only good for your heart’s health, but also for your mental health. Do some form of exercise that significantly raises your heart rate for 30 minutes at least four times a week and move frequently during the day.
  3. Eat less, more often. Food is fuel. Lean proteins and complex carbohydrates are high-octane fuel. You’re best off when you keep feeding your internal furnace in small doses throughout the day, beginning with breakfast.
  4. Renew more. Human beings aren’t designed to work continuously. We’re meant instead to move between spending and renewing energy. Ideally, take a break every 90 minutes, even if only to spend a minute or two breathing deeply.
  5. Invest in those you love. The greatest gift you can give is your absorbed attention. Better to be fully present with someone for an hour than physically present, but distracted, for multiple hours.
  6. Give thanks. We’re far quicker to notice what’s wrong in our lives than we are what’s right. At least once a week, handwrite and mail a note of appreciation to someone who deserves it, telling the person precisely what you’re grateful for.
  7. Do the most important thing first. Early in the morning, you’re likely to have the most energy and the fewest distractions. Start your workday by focusing without interruption, for 60 to 90 minutes, on the most important and/or challenging task you can accomplish that day.
  8. Practice reflection. We’re so preoccupied with the urgent that we rarely take time to think about what it is we’re doing. Set aside 15 to 30 minutes at the end of each work day (or in the evening) to reflect quietly and without interruption on what you learned that day, and what your highest priorities are for the following day.
  9. Keep learning. Our brains work better if we challenge them, and life becomes more interesting when we do. Reading books is a simple and surefire way to learn and grow, but so is building a daily practice around learning a new language, a sport, a musical instrument, or around how to write code, fix a car, or draw.
  10. Give back. Take at least one hour a week to put your own needs aside and devote that time instead to adding value to the world at large. One hour a week is very little time, but it’s a start — and it’s also more than most of us regularly give.

 

I am still working at doing more of each however I can say I am doing 6, 7 and 9 pretty well.  I just need to attend to 2, 3 and 4 a little better.  What about you?

 

If you’d like support to get your life back in control – get in touch today.

Image of Leaders

What type of leader are you?

Developing an Effective Style of Leadership

Energy Leadership™ is the process that develops a personally effective style of leadership that positively influences and changes not only yourself but also those with whom you work and interact, as well as your organization as a whole.

As individuals, we view the world through filters (based on a range of influences, including our experiences, values, and assumptions). Those filters will either limit what we see or expand what we see. 

As a result, they impact how we perceive and what we think about our circumstances. Throughout our whole life, we’ve unconsciously developed filters, which may be holding us back from seeing the full potential of ourselves and what our life and career have to offer.

Leadership: Everyone is a leader either by choice or default.

Leadership is how you interact with everyone, including yourself. Leaders are quite visible within small and large businesses. We tend to think of them as business owners, CEOs, and managers at all levels. Traditionally, leadership also extends into politics and other global affairs. However, parents, therapists, and health care providers, solopreneurs, sports coaches, consultants, mentors, partners in a relationship, teachers, authors, and others who interact with people regularly are all leaders.

If you don’t think of yourself as a leader, then you are limited in your thinking. Leading is the way we help move people into action, including us. 

The question is not whether or not we are leaders, but how well we lead.

Energy Leadership 

Bruce Schneider, from the Institute of Professional Excellence in Coaching, wrote an excellent book called Energy Leadership. He borrowed two terms from nature to describe energy as it relates to leadership.  

He used the term “catabolic energy” to represent destructive, draining energy and “anabolic energy” to describe constructive forces within an individual, which leads to success.

Anabolic Vs Catabolic Leadership

Here are two lists that describe the differences between successful leaders and those who are stressed and who stress those around them.

Anabolic Leader Catabolic Leader
Leads by encouraging others to take their own next steps Manages by controls that push and pull
Shares projects and becomes one of the team Delegates everything so they can blame others later
Shares detailed information and works to get feedback and buy-in from others Gives information without justification or buy-in
Listens, weights and uses the feedback of others when possible Disregards other’s ideas and makes their own decisions
Plans and develops for the future Works for today and in crisis mode most times
Understands and uses emotional intelligence Analyses everything in left-brain mode
Identifies the opportunities in everything Focuses time and energy on problems and challenges
Sees the heart of the human resources Is self-focused and uses staff to get ahead for selfish reasons

 

When you look at the descriptors in each of the columns, you can easily choose which type of energy is best for you to use when it comes to dealing with others. And that’s just the point – you choose.

The kind of leader you chose to be, in any context, from being the leader at home to being the leader of a multi-million dollar organisation, is a moment-by-moment choice.

And the power of choice is fuelled by discernment, decisiveness, and dedication to what’s right.

As you start your day today, read both columns and make your choice!

If you would like to find out more about Energy Leadership – and our range of coaching programs, get in touch for a complimentary 30-minute consultation.

 

Increase your emotional intelligence

How to Increase Your Emotional Intelligence

What is Emotional Intelligence?

Emotional Intelligence (EI) is the capacity to effectively perceive, express, understand and manage your emotions and the emotions of others in an effective and appropriate manner. Research has shown that EI is a strong predictor of success in the workplace, more so than IQ, skill sets, personality, and experience.

Why is Emotional Intelligence so important?

Enhancing and developing a greater awareness and application of EI will have a significant impact on all aspects of your life, including more self-awareness and improved relationships with co-workers, friends, family, and others who are significant in your life.

People who improve their EI capabilities are able to decrease stress – personally and professionally, enhance interpersonal relationships, and demonstrate greater leadership and decision-making skills. Even more important, raising EI has a direct and positive effect on your level of consciousness.

What can you do to increase your Emotional Intelligence?

Here are a few tips on how to increase your Emotional Intelligence, taken from iPEC’s Energy Leadership Development SystemTM, a full coaching certification program that I undertook. They are so simple, yet so powerful!

  • Begin to take notice of how your thoughts affect your emotions, and as a result, how your emotions affect your actions. Self- awareness is the key to beginning to shift your energy and increase EI. As you go through your day, be aware of how you react to situations, and what thoughts are going through your head as you do so. If someone cuts you off on the road, and your thought is ‘What an idiot,’ your resulting emotion would be anger. If you think instead ‘Wow, he must really be in a rush to get somewhere,” your emotion would most likely be very different. As you become more self-aware, you’ll be able to identify your emotional triggers.
  • Journal about areas to improve your awareness and expression of your emotions. What’s working, and what’s not working for you? What relationships need improvement?
  • Journal about ways to manage and control your emotions. What has been effective for you, and what hasn’t? How do you want to respond, and how can you do so?
  • Practice meditation/centring to be able to build a stronger tolerance for anxiety.
  • Each day, set your intention to be more aware of your thoughts/feelings and how they might affect you and/or others.
  • When you’re very angry or upset, give yourself 5-10 minutes alone, prior to taking any action. Then ask yourself what would be the best way to address the situation. Think about how you’d like to respond. Taking a little break will help you better manage your response and avoid a “knee-jerk” reaction.
  • Seek out others who will assist you, objectively, in providing observations of how they experience you expressing and/or managing/controlling your emotions. You may be surprised at how others view you.
  • Tell others you want to increase your understanding of their thoughts and feelings and “check-in” with them periodically about this. You’ll soon become better at reading others.
  • After getting a buy-in, offer feedback to those around you about their emotional awareness, expression, and management.
  • Practice incorporating new skills and behaviours and being aware of how others respond to you.
  • Interview others who demonstrate high EI, to learn some of their strategies for responding to stressful situations.
  • Take an Energy Leadership IndexTM  Learn more about Energy Leadership here.

If you’d like to increase your Emotional Intelligence and improve your outcomes both at work and at home,  Get in touch!

Overcoming Fear

What Are You Afraid Of?

Are you pursing the goals that matter most to you?
Are you satisfied with your level of success?
Are you glad to be where you are in life?
Are you playing YOUR own game or are you playing someone else’s game?

Everything seems hard. We are all busy and we are all tired. We all don’t have enough money. We all know someone who says we can’t or that we would never make it. And then we are worried with what comes next. Are these excuses familiar to you?

What about these:

• Fear of change
• Fear of failure
• Fear of not being good enough
• Waiting for something to happen
• Perfectionism
• Being overwhelmed with all that you have to do
• Not know how

Well guess what – there is a battle going on….. and it is between your ears!!

Don’t surrender. While your fears may be real they are not good enough reasons for inaction. Your biggest work is in front of you and it has to do with how well you lead your life – how good are you at self-leadership?

Understanding Energy Leadership is in my opinion the missing link or secret ingredient to making all the methodologies you’ve tried and tossed aside about leadership, work — the petrol in the engine, the currency that fuels your success. Today let’s focus on energy itself. What is this mysterious quality? It’s not just movement or activity, sometimes it is stillness and reflection. Some call it a vitality or force. Energy gives us the capability to differentiate ourselves from another. Energy gives us the physical ability and drive to win the marathon — not in the first 25 miles — but in the last mile, when it is so easy to give up.

Energy can be conserved, stored, stockpiled, transformed, leaked and shared. In life we get energy from an amazing array of fuels. We can use this power to grow and develop, use our senses well, attract and repel other energy.

Now let’s look at leadership. Interestingly each of us leads by choice or default. The question is not whether you are a leader but how well you purpose to lead. To lead well takes awareness of your energy and a willingness to learn ways to use it better. Your body is a perfect example of an energy system. It’s self-contained, self-governed and thought-affected. Each thought you have contributes a specific energy pattern to the energy within and around you. There are no idle thoughts. Your energy encompasses every thought, feeling, and emotion you’ve had today, as well as, your recent actions. Because thoughts create energy in their own likeness – some can injure and others heal.

Energy Leadership Coaching is designed to reveal and develop your personally-effective style of leadership energy. This energy will positively influence and change not only you, but your family members, friends and everyone you work with and meet each day.

Albert Einstein is reputed to have said: “Everything is energy and that’s all there is to it. Match the frequency of the reality you want and you cannot help but get that reality. It can be no other way. This is not philosophy. This is physics.”

Well, regardless of who said this, I know that energy is also the secret power of great leadership. Once you understand how you create your reality and attract the things you do in your life, you can create the life you really want. Where to start? Here are some tips about how to overcome fear, and any excuses you may have.

  1. Identify your goal and embrace it. Use this question as a start. What do you want the change to look like? How will that give your life meaning? Think about it – even go for a walk to reflect on it.
  2. Create the space – even a small space (or time) to make a change.
  3. Be accountable to someone while surrounding yourself with others making similar changes themselves.
  4. Take small steps that will move you forward. Movement begets movement. Now take another small step…… and change is created. It is time to decide what you intend to do next and what the next few years will mean to you.

I feel this is so important that for the month of September only I am offering a 20% discount on all my coaching programs when booked. Get in touch today to find out more about Energy Leadership and our one-to-one coaching programs.

Self Love Coaching

Do You Love Yourself? | MindShifts | Energy Leadership

Over the years working on myself and coaching executives, I have learnt a little secret that I wanted to share with you.  It is quite simple – You can only love others as much as you love yourself.  Surprisingly simple yet so profound.  Just think about it.  You can only give to others, what you give to yourself.  Turning that on its head, what you give to yourself is in fact what you draw to yourself.

Wayne Dwyer said it so beautifully :

“Make a pact to remind yourself often of this secret of not being able to give away anything you don’t have. Then work on your personal program of self-love, self-respect, and self-empowerment, and create a huge inventory of what you wish to give away.

One of the lessons I continue to learn and practice is that the universe responds with the same energy that we send out. If you attract a lot of people who wish to take advantage of you, you need to consider what you’re doing to attract victimizers into your life. If you run into anger a lot, explore the angry thoughts you have inside you. If your consciousness is a “Gimme! Gimme! Gimme!” energy, you’ll attract all manner of demanding energies into your life. You know if this is true by the number of deadlines not being met, demanding bosses or customers you encounter, and the feeling of being a victim. Send out “Gimme! Gimme! Gimme!” energy to the universe, and it will do the same in return.

If what you give is self-respect and self-love, the universe, via the attractor energy, will return the love and respect you’ve been radiating. It’s really so simple. You can’t give away what you don’t have.”

Energy Leadership Index & Life Coaching

If you are interested to learn how victim thinking or negative thoughts might be impacting your life, your work and your relationships with others, get in touch to discuss our coaching programs and the Energy Leadership Index.

 

When I look at me, who do I see?

My wonderful colleague Jack Speer from Delta Associates http://delta-associates.com wrote this wonderful post. I just had to share it with you. It is about how you really see yourself when you look in the mirror.

Are you happy or horrified? What is your self concept when you look at yourself? Some people can’t get enough of their own face in the mirror, others avoid looking at all. Where do you sit?

As an executive coach one of the most important aspects of coaching is working on what a person sees when they see themselves—their fundamental self-concept. You have to get self-concept right for anything else to be right. The ”Me” in the mirror is fundamentally a reflection of how you perceive life. What you see will literally be what you get in your life.

The health of your self-concept is almost as important as your physical health. It is so fundamental and foundational that no matter how smart you are, how many degrees you’ve earned, your work experience—self concept trumps everything else. To a great extent your self-concept will determine your station in life, your wealth, your happiness and well-being.

Do You Accept False information about Yourself—Why!?

My father was not a self-disclosing person, so it surprised me one day when I was a teenager when he told me that he would have been happier and more successful in life if he hadn’t been so ugly. Nothing could have been farther from the truth as revealed by his childhood photos. Later in middle age, he was a very good-looking and distinguished man. He simply accepted false information that he was given about himself.

You may be carrying around false information that was given you very young, and you still believe it.

The Wrong Kind of Humility Can Ruin Your Life—Stop It!

Religious upbringing, parents, and culture have a lot to say about how you’re likely to see yourself. I grew up hearing sermons about being humble, and my West Texas parents told me and my brother over and over again—”don’t get the big head.” If I had ever told my parents I wanted to grow up rich and famous, they would have sat me down for a good talking to. It was out of the world view of my West Texas relatives. The opposite of humble is not really haughty. It’s a belief in yourself to be self-confident and to serve those around you.

Change Ideas that Will Change Your Life—If You’ll Do Them!

Here are some thoughts for you every day when you look in the mirror—they will change your life, but not all at once—changing your self-concept is as difficult as anything you’ll ever do. So here it is . . .

 1. Be true to you–your very own guru. When you look into the mirror, you’re seeing in you a unique individual, never ever to be repeated in the history of the world. There are many guides and sources of knowledge and inspiration—but you are the only one capable of evaluating what you receive, and making the final decision.

People spend a lifetime looking in the mirror and trying to dress, speak, and style themselves like someone they have seen and admired. What they say is what they think people want them to say. When they walk into a room, they wonder who they should try to be.

You certainly must remember you’re not God nor Superman. At the same time, you must trust yourself ultimately. It doesn’t mean you have to abandon your belief, faith, or respect for authority—nothing further from my point. It simply means that you are the last word. Otherwise, you run the risk of drinking someone else’s Kool-Aid—not healthy!

2. Be your own hero—There is no one else you should admire more. When I became my own hero people around me began to look at me differently—like a leader they depended on. Previously, nobody ever beat up on me and put me down like I put down myself. When I was victim of my bad self-concept, everyone responded to me accordingly. Every time I tried to take a role of leadership, I got the feeling that people were saying, “Who do you think you are?” The reason they responded that way was I didn’t believe in who I was. When I believed in myself, others believed in me.

3. Don’t let anyone put you down or limit you because of physical appearance—there’s no “Leaders Look”. At 5’8” inches, I’m getting shorter every year as people grow taller. I go to the gym several times a week and pass by young people who are anywhere from 6’5” up to approaching 7 feet. I am a dwarf compared to these people. Yet short people are doing some really tall things. One of my favourite personalities is Meet the Press host, Chuck Todd, 5’3”, who beat out a lot of very tall people for that position. So if there is something about your physical appearance that you can do something about, work to change it, certainly. But short, tall, fat, homely people who believe in themselves are achieving huge accomplishments every day.

4. Develop your own style that works for you. Leaders come in all kinds of wrappings. I have also known leaders who are incredibly shy, physically unappealing, take-charge people, don’t make any waves folks, sharp elbowed, aggressive personalities, quiet, talkative—all who were successful within their own styles. These people see themselves as leaders and when they walk into a room people often ask, why? It is because of their own self-concept and belief in themselves. Every day you are auditioning for the leading role in the greatest movie of all—the stage play about your life. As the star of that play, you don’t want to walk out on the stage, forget your lines, and fall on your face. It’s not easy to be a star, but you’re in that role. Play that role to the hilt. It’s worth the performance.

 

Find out how you can improve your self-concept. Get in touch for a complimentary coaching session – click here.

Opportunity Everywhere

Opportunities Everywhere!

Think about the word “problem”.

This word actually produces stress because we feel we must solve something, it’s likely to be complicated, and somehow we’ll be graded on how we solve the problem.

The word “challenge”, although a vast improvement over the word “problem”, still carries hidden emotional baggage.

It comes with feelings that maybe you’ll be “humiliated” if your performance isn’t equal to others or you’ll have to climb over a great obstacle or run a tiring race.

The words “problem” and “challenge” are emotive words, meaning there are feelings and emotions that accompany them. Most of the time we’re unaware of these emotions as the words are so common.

When you see a challenge you naturally begin to see reasons why it can’t be achieved. When you see a problem, you see failure looming. With both, you’re recognising a manifestation of a fear you have. Once you’re victim to the fear of failure you can’t think in a healthy way.

The answer? Change your perspective.

What if there was no such thing as problems or challenges?

What if there were only opportunities to test what you believed, no failures to keep you from trying, and only growth from your experiences?

“What would you attempt to do today if you knew you could not fail?”

There’s huge power in this kind of thinking! (Which is another good reason to have an objective coach in your life.) Changing your perspective –just the way you use a word for example – helps you tap into an inner energy to accomplish your dreams. Changing your perspective helps you identify and overcome internal obstacles and barriers so you can succeed!

For more information on MindShifts Coaching and Mentoring Programs please click here, or get in touch today.

Positive Energy

Creating Positive Energy With Your Words

One of the ways we generate energy is as a result of the words we use. Every word spoken or read creates an image and energy in our minds.

Did you know that we actually remember positive words better than negative words!

Here’s an example: Don’t dump rubbish here! Sounds OK. It communicates! But in your mind something amazing happens when you read this – amazing but not good. Why not good? Well, when you read an instruction that is worded negatively, you have to switch tracks from “I can’t dump rubbish here” to “where in the world AM I supposed to dump the rubbish!”

What’s better and more effective to say is: “Dump rubbish here.”

Eliminating one word turns the negative order into a positive order that can be easily followed and avoids having to switch around in a thought dilemma, which wastes time and creates negative energy!

Here are a couple more to consider:

 

So think carefully about the words you use and the positive energy they bring to you and to those around you.

This month, practice using positive words and let me know how you go. You could always share how you are going on the MindShifts Facebook page.

Personal Planner

What’s your personal plan for 2018?

Most of us have a personal plan – of some kind. It might be a list of things that you’re ‘hoping’ to achieve… and sometimes you might have it ‘written down somewhere’.

After working with successful people for over 20 years as a business advisor and coach I know from experience that for a plan to be achievable it must be explicit and ‘alive’. Having a plan in your head just isn’t going to cut it.

By articulating and writing it out, you will become clearer on the outcomes that you want to achieve. Are you looking to develop your career, inject more fun and enjoyment into your days, enhance relationships, or get on top of your finances or health?

Having a written plan is the first step…

Here are some tips to get your personal plan started:

1. Pick a future point in time (maybe the end of the year, or in 3 – 5 years) and imagine your ideal life. What does it look like? What are you doing that is different from today?

Action: Download our wheel of life to help you with this process – and reflect on how you have addressed each area of your life at the point in time you have selected.

2. For each area of your life, write down what are you good at, what makes you happy, and what you could improve? Make a list of your strengths and the areas you need to address.

3. Choose one area to focus on. (If you try to focus on too many areas at once you may end up giving up.) Write down what your ultimate objective is – and the steps you need to take to achieve the ideal scenario you’ve described. How will you know if you have achieved your goal? Like any objective you need to make sure it’s measurable.

4. Get a support person or coach to keep you focused and accountable. As I often say, it is hard to keep focus when you are up to your armpit in alligators!

5. Once you feel you are moving forward in one area, you can begin to look at other parts of your life. Remember to set some clear milestones so you know that you are moving in the right direction.

Most people think that planning is confined to the office, and limited to finance and budgets. However to create the life that you want – you must plan for it. While there may be a budget somewhere in your plan, a major part of the process will involve taking the time to think, articulate and measure where you are now – where you want to go – and how and when you’re going to get there.

You create your life.

After all, you are the leader of your life.